Get A Grip

I am a horrible person - I've been made happy by the injury of my nephew.

We were all scheduled to have dinner at the Lodge tonight with Wentworth as the special guest. The Musgroves met him last week in town and invited him over for tonight’s dinner. I was to go tonight too, of course.

I dreaded the dinner all day long. I thought up a thousand excuses to avoid going, but in the end I decided I should just get it over with. If Wentworth is going to be in the area for a while, then I will have to see him, I will have to learn how to be unaffected by his being around.

About two hours before dinner my nephew got into some mayhem outside while Charles wasn't looking and managed to fracture his arm! He went to the hospital and has been bandaged up and will be fine. Mary was in hysterics when it happened but recovered enough to want to still go to the dinner.

It was arranged that I would stay with my nephew while Mary and Charles went to dinner. I was surprised they both would choose a party over nursing their injured son, but I may have encouraged them to go since it allowed me to delay the meeting with Wentworth a bit longer.

The coward in me triumphed tonight.

They've left for the dinner and my nephew is asleep, leaving me awake to wonder what Wentworth must be feeling at the prospect of meeting me again. I assume he is indifferent. He is probably totally unaffected by my name. He could have reached out to me at any time during the past eight years and he didn't. Obviously he has moved on. He must have some small curiosity, though, right?

Walk in the Woods

In the rush of productivity I had after getting feedback on my program proposal, I forgot to post the link to the short video I made a few days ago! Nothing fancy, just some snippets from one of my walks in the woods (without Bandit). We had a sunny day - which can be a rare thing in November - and I wanted to share how peaceful the woods are here with you.

I'm pretty bad at filming video footage, but I think it gets the setting across.  Maybe helps you understand how lovely it is here, and how my daily walks help me keep my sanity.

On the social front - the Musgroves have met Wentworth and invited him to dinner. Am trying not to think about that.

Click here if the video doesn't show up below.

Feedback

I got the feedback from my old professor and her colleague and both of them were overwhelmingly positive about what I have proposed!!!

They provided some critical analysis too, suggestions, advice for additional people I can contact for more information and possible resources.

I'm practically buzzing right now - both from the positive feedback and the critical. I've been working on this alone in isolation for months now (how has that much time passed already??), it is amazing to have knowledgeable outside input and encouragement.

I have excused myself from all of Mary's plans for today and am driving into town to work at the library. I want to make progress while I'm so energized!

In conclusion: yay!!

Literacy Program - Info and Inspiration

I'm expecting to get feedback from my old professor and her colleague on my program brief tomorrow, and I'm feeling rather nervous about it. I'm not sure what I'll do if they tear the idea to shreds.

While I wait, I continue to troll the internet looking for more information, more inspiration for my program - there is some amazing stuff going on out there to improve literacy in kids, it's wonderful and inspiring.

Here are some of the things I've found lately, in case anyone is as interested in this as I am:

An interesting article this morning about research showing the dramatic results one ipad-based learn-to-read app had on early literacy test scores. Fodder for the debate about screen time for kids, something I don't know much about. (Although Mary lets my nephew have as much time with the tablet as he wants.)  http://www.fastcolabs.com/3037603/yes-ipad-apps-can-help-your-child-learn-to-read 

An interesting, easy to understand summary of where kids typically are with reading by various ages - I find this fascinating:
by age 5-6:  http://www.kidspot.com.au/schoolzone/Reading-Literacy-milestones-5-6+4168+305+article.htm
by age 7-8: http://www.kidspot.com.au/schoolzone/Reading-Literacy-milestones-7-8+4169+305+article.htm
etc.

This example of a journalism writing/editing program for kids that gets them exciting about reading and writing in a way normal classroom activities don't - partly because they are doing it in the office of a real newspaper: http://www.theguardian.com/media/mind-your-language/2014/oct/28/mind-your-language-children-love-language-writing-wordplay

That last one is really inspiring to me - that's what I get excited about. Those kids are not stigmatized by getting to participate in that program, probably the opposite - getting picked to participate makes you the lucky one. That's the kind of program I want to run.

Sisters

One of the things I both love and hate about being at the Lodge is seeing Rietta and Louisa together. They are like the sisters you see in movies – they share interests and get excited about the same stuff, they enjoy each other’s company, they support and encourage each other. They understand each other. It’s lovely to see two people who have such a great relationship. It also serves to highlight what is missing in my own family relationships.

Family is such a funny thing, isn't it? A collection of people you have a bond with that is so strong you may depend on them when you are in trouble, while at the same time, they may not really know you at all. In fact, family has this special 'right' of treating each other far worse than they would ever dare treat strangers. Why is that? 

I often fall into the habit of dismissing my sisters' concerns as being trivial, as they do mine. I'm trying to be better about it lately - to remember that while I might disagree with the level of importance they assign things, it's not all about me. I try to see things from their perspective, to listen, to withhold judgement. It's really hard! And then I see Rietta and Louisa together and I get so jealous because they are so easy with each other; it's not work for them. How wonderful that must be!

Am I the only one that struggles to connect with siblings? Is it me?

Fall

Whenever I don't feel like blogging, I resort to a photo of Bandit in the woods.  I feel like I should apologize, but really, wasn't the internet created for posting photos of animals?

Impending Visitor

I sent off my program summary to my old professor on Friday. While I wait for feedback on it I am being kept busy entertaining my nephew (and Mary) and many visits with the Musgroves and their various guests.

On the home front? The Crofts met the Musgroves when they were up here and the meeting prompted the Musgroves to realize that their late son, Richard, briefly worked for Mrs. Croft's brother, Wentworth, several years ago. So they have been speaking of Wentworth rather a lot.

I blushed at first when his name was mentioned and would find myself distracted - flubbing a board game or piano piece, but I’ve grown somewhat used to it and now it hardly bothers me. We’re told Wentworth will be visiting Mrs. Croft soon and then plans to come up here to do some hiking. The Musgroves are determined that he visit them when he is here so they can thank them for their kindness to 'poor Richard'.

I must be able to act like a normal person around the mention of his name. Usually I’m quite good at swallowing my true feelings and showing a calm exterior. The fact that Wentworth can unnerve me after all these years is…. alarming. It’s been eight years, how much has changed in eight years? Everything, right?

Mary has little patience for all this talk of ‘poor Richard’. Richard was not what you would call a success - he tended to spend his family’s money faster than they provided it, and switched jobs every year or so – always off on some new scheme for overnight success. He worked for one of Wentworth’s start-ups for a few months, but it happened to be one of those spells when Richard called his parents regularly and stayed out of trouble, and it seems his parents are attributing that improved behaviour to Wentworth’s influence. Since Richard’s death a few years ago, his faults have been softened and his virtues magnified; a treatment we all probably hope for when we pass on.

The Musgroves are adamant about meeting Wentworth, now that they know of his connection with their Richard.

I wonder what it will be like when we meet again?