Monday, October 27, 2014

A kind of sickness

I went down to breakfast this morning to find out Mary was ‘ill’. Charles told me this without any commentary except for a slight eye-roll.

I took Mary her toast and tea in bed and we talked. Apparently she and Charles had an argument during their drive yesterday. Mary tried to convince Charles to cancel the golf trip he is planning with his friend. I got to hear all her arguments against it, mostly about leaving her alone with their son (she didn't mention the nanny they have four days a week, Mrs. Musgrove, or me). Really it’s about the friend; Mary doesn't think he’s good enough and worries it hurts Charles’s prospects to be seen socializing with him. So Mary, in response to Charles refusing to yield to her wishes, is now ill. This is not unusual and will pass in a day or two when Mary tires of missing out on things.

I often wonder if it is possible for this belief in the importance of social standing to be a genetic trait. Did I miss out on that feature in the genetic lottery? Or is it taught? Did Dad hold classes on it with Mary and Elizabeth while I was outside playing? The three of them think this stuff is really significant. They will be friends with someone or not based on whether or not the person is rich enough or influential enough - to be honest, I’m not that clear on the niceties of what it takes to pass muster. I have my own snobberies about what I want in a friend, I’m not going to deny that, but I don’t care how much money someone has or how connected they are to a distant aristocracy that doesn’t matter anymore. I’m hard-pressed to think of qualities that would have less influence on whether someone is enjoyable company.

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