Life as a House Guest

There is something strange about being a house guest for an extended time. You begin to feel like you exist just for others - that if they stopped needing or wanting you, you would just vaporize into nothingness. I’m struggling to get work done on the business plan for my non-profit idea, I find it hard to carve out any regular time in my schedule, find it hard to concentrate when I do get the time. I've decided to give it up for the holidays and try again after Christmas.

One of the great things about staying at Lacy's is her beautiful mini grand piano. It is stunningly beautiful, isn't it?  It's from 1915 or so and has been passed down through her family. Lacy doesn't play but she takes immaculate care of it and encourages me to play it whenever I'm here. It's tricky to play, feels very very different from my digital piano and from the modern grand piano at Dad's house, so I don't feel like I do very well on it - but it's still a privileged to play a piano with such history. I wonder about all the things it has seen in its years, sitting in various grand living rooms.

Lacy and I visited the Crofts today. I thought it would be awkward, visiting at my own house, but the Crofts are taking excellent care of it, and in some ways seem more deserving of it, seem more appreciative of it. In any case, it was nice to see them again. They assured me that hadn't made any changes at all except to remove a mirror from the master bedroom. Mr. Croft offered to let me tour around so I could be satisfied all was well. It was very nice of him but not at all necessary. Though I haven't known them long, I can tell the Crofts are good people and I trust them.

Wentworth had told Sophy (Mrs. Croft) about what happened in Lyme and had led her to believe that I had done something extraordinary after the accident; I told her it was nothing, that I had simply made sure someone called an ambulance.

Mrs. Croft: “If you say so, Anne. But I’m sure Wentworth said you were the only one in the group who behaved sensibly - that people were fainting all around and you kept your head. He even said he was useless and if it hadn't been for you, they would probably all still be standing on the beach wondering what they should do.”

I laughed at this, but really was quite lifted up - to know that Wentworth was able to think and say positive things about me…

Mr. Croft mentioned they will be away over the holidays, so there is no risk of me running into Wentworth while in the neighbourhood at Lacy’s. I can relax. I imagine Wentworth will be spending his time in Lyme where Louisa is.